It’s really not about you..

Happy new month, I can’t believe February went by just like that…..

Hope you have plans to be kinetic in March, don’t just exist, live! And if you are asking “what does she mean”, then you obviously missed a post, so catch up here >>> Living Life… . We’d be waiting for you.😊

I read a blogpost by a pastor I love too much, she was addressing couples having challenges in their marriage and she made this statement…

Listen to me, satan is not after your marriage just to break your heart….

I pondered on that sentence for a while and thought to myself, “how true!” I’d explain. Mrs B married Mr B with a dream of happily ever after playing in her head, but years later she is yet to see the ‘happily’ much less the ‘ever after’, why? Well, maybe Mr B lost his Job and things became tight, or maybe they have been unable to have children after 5 years of marriage or maybe Mr B was diagnosed with an incurable disease and now Mrs B has been ‘reduced’ to a nurse when all she wanted to be was a wife.

These are all scenarios that can easily play out in real life, and Mrs B can choose to see things from either of two perspectives.

Perspective 1– Why me? what have I done wrong? can ever be happy? life is so unfair to me, God doesn’t love me.

Perspective 2– Why is this happening? what is God teaching me through this process? who can be encouraged by my story? how can I remain strong and maintain my Joy inspite of this? Everyone has his/her own challenge, if I’m facing this, it’s because I can handle it.

The first perspective is self centered, it’s who we are when we think everything is primarily about us, and we can’t see beyond the tip of our nose. The second perspective is when we look outside of ourselves to see the big picture. Which is what God sees (and which is the tagline of this blog😊).

The point being made In the blogpost I mentioned earlier was this; sometimes satan brings confusion into a marriage and while all we see is how it affects me and how my heart is broken by the issue on ground, that issue is just a distraction, the devil has other aims and while you are busy nursing a broken heart and thinking about how unhappy you are, you forget about your children that need a role model to look up to for gudiance, you forget all those other people whose only hope in God is what they see in your life, so you blindly make poor decisions that have long lasting implications on not just you but a whole generation of people that are walking in your steps.

I believe this is true for issues even outside marriage.

So on the flip side, God is not investing in you just to make you happy, he isn’t allowing those challenges just so you can say you triumphed, He isn’t. He has a big picture and somewhere in there is you, and everything you do or do not do has a way of affecting how that picture turns out. God has eternity on his mind, so when he molds us, it is with the perspective of what’s best for eternity and not just our hearts.

We need to begin to see the big picture too, look beyond yourself and your own happiness and see how your life fits into this masterpiece God is weaving for eternity. You know why this is so important? I’d tell you, when we begin to see things through His eyes, it changes the way we react to life, it changes the choices we make, and path we take because we realise that it’s not just about us.

So Mrs B would stay strong and wade through the storm instead of wailing why me all day, because she understands that there’s something more than her hurting heart involved.

See the big picture!


4 thoughts on “It’s really not about you..

    • So so true…Some challenges are definitely much more ‘challenging’ than others, but like you said it’s still necessary that we look at the big picture (even if it’s after a few ‘why me’s). Thank you!


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