My mind, in a haze

There’s thick Black white smoke hovering in the place i call my mind (i decided the smoke had to be white because I’m a child of light😊).

My overactive mind seems to be in a haze! I seem to be searching for thoughts to think but no grand ideas present themselves. I’m afraid my mind is becoming normal😰! Maybe it’s because of the fatigue of my body, maybe it’s extending to my mind, maybe its this thing or that thing,  i cant really tell, Or maybe its a phase and i should just give it time, or maybe, just maybe I’m fine.

Hmm, this makes remember periods when I’ve been so confused about issues on which i had so many questions and no answers at all. I find it really frustrating when there are issues i can’t deal with. I want it settled, I want a solution now, but none is forthcoming (patience is one virtue I tend to have in minute quantity). Sometimes it is easy to forget that we aren’t supposed to have all the answers, we aren’t meant to get it right all the time (if we did, we’d be God), mistakes and wrong choices don’t mean we are dull, sometimes they are reminders to us of our need for a God that’s PERFECT in all he does.

I read something sometime ago, that our dissapointment in ourselves when we fail to accomplish a task shows that we thought too highly of ourselves in the first place. We thought we could make it happen, we thought if we only plan right and execute accordingly then definitely things would turn out right. In those times we feel self sufficient, we forget that there’s a greater power at work that calls the actual shots. The truth is, when there’s an understanding that we aren’t omnipotent or omniscient, getting it wrong is not a suprise, its just once again a reminder that we are not infallible and that everyday, we need someone who is, infallible.

Its ok not to have it toghether all the time, it’s ok to be confused and need answers, its ok not to always have the right words to say, or know the right things to do, and its also ok to seek God in these times. Be patient with yourself.

I hope i haven’t just downloaded a whole lot of mumbo-jumbo, but if i have, i blame it on my foggy mind. Nevertheless, i still think if you’d look closely enough through the fog and haze and white smoke, you just might see a lesson or two for you😉.


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